You're an unrestricted free agent who spent last season in football hell - Buffalo. You'd think you would try and make the most of your offeason and prepare for next season, when hopefully you'll be with a team who actually has a QB and can contend for a playoff spot. Or maybe not. Myabe you want to a wear a lame wig and take your shirt off, exposing a cheesey gold necklace. And if you're gonna do it, you might want to find a designer who can make pants that don't look the sweats that the fat kid wore when you abused him in a rumble-fumble beatdown when you were 10 years old. (Via TMZ)
Introducing Silver's Corner! Mike Silver - an aggressively disgruntled Chicagoan with very tiny feet - offers insights, observations and (occasionally) cooking tips to help you get through your miserable existence.
Hi there! Name's Silver, what's yours? Really? Well, I guess that could sound ok...with ...maybe a nice last name. Oh. In that case, maybe you have a nick name? You don't? Fancy that. Well, let's just move on...Seriously, that's your name? This isn't some horrible joke? How is your relationship with your parents? Yeah, I'd have the same. Enough about you, let me give you a quick introduction about myself and what you can look forward to reading in this section moving forward.
Height: 6'2" (1.87 meters for you blokes across the pond) Weight: 192lbs (87.27 kilos - That's a lot of cocaine if I happened to be made out of cocaine!) Temperature: Medium-rare Likes: Whiskey, food (both eating and cooking), beer, old Royal Rumbles, hip-hop, FIFA (the video game, not the corrupt head of world football), sweatpants and torn hoodies Dislikes: Fashion, flavored alcohols, new-age diets, small talk, smoking bans, high-pitched laughs, snakes (especially on planes), Adrian Brody Sports Teams: Chicago White Sox, Chicago Bears, Chicago Blackhawks, Arsenal, and if you can teach me how cricket and/or rugby is played, you can select my allegiance for that particular sport Full Disclosure: I have a beard
Now, the focus of this section has not been fully fleshed out - hell, it's barely been thought about - so what will follow is a thought dump (one of the more culturally accepted dumps) for whatever wacky theory, rant, recipe, thought or observation that pops into my head. Tread carefully my new found friends, things could get weird.
I will start this as I start most of my relationships: by bringing the sane, simple, and helpful Me. FYI, I wait for the crazy to start leaking out around date #2. Below is a great recipe that should help make you the star of any BBQ, back yard get together or intervention.
The Buffalo Bill "Would you eat me? I'd eat me. I'd eat me hard!"
Ingredients - 1lb ground buffalo - 1 jalapeno - 1 clove garlic (minced) - 1/4 white onion (diced finely) - 1 sprig Rosemary - 1 tsp liquid smoke - Pack of kaiser rolls (or really any of your favorite bun) - Toasted - Sharp Cheddar cheese (can leave out if you want to stay a bit healthier) - Salt and pepper - 1 tomato
Preparation First, you want to roast the jalapeno. To do this, use any open flame you have - grill, gas stove, blow torch, Olympic Torch - and place the jalapeno on top, turning every couple of minutes. You should get a nice char on the outside. Once roasted, dice the jalapeno, remembering to wash your hands THOROUGHLY after this. Especially if you have a date later that night. Trust me on that one. This roasting process should help lower the heat from the jalapeno, turning it into more of a assisting flavor and not over powering any other ingredient.
Next, mix the buffalo, diced jalapeno, garlic, onion, rosemary, liquid smoke, salt and pepper in a bowl. Let sit - the longer the better. If it will be sitting over night, refrigerate, but remember to bring back to room temperature before cooking.
Section the meat into 3 large - 4 small - patties and place on grill or grill pan over high heat. Cooking times will depend on heat of the grill/stove, but 4 minutes a side should suffice. If you must err, err on the side of less cooking time. Buffalo is an incredibly lean meat, meaning it can dry out very quickly. If you are adding cheese, place on patties after flipping.
Remove patties from grill and let rest on a plate for 2 minutes. Place patties on toasted buns, top with sliced tomato, and whatever topping you like - I'd suggest trying it without anything else as there are a lot of flavors going on already.
Serve along side some home-made chips (crisps) or if you're looking to keep it healthy, serve alongside grilled zucchini spears. Just slice a couple zucchinis into spears, drizzle with olive oil and season with sea salt and pepper. Place on grill until a good char is reached, but leaving a bit of crunch in the middle.
Consumption Enjoy this great burger while watching Silence of the Lambs, while reading the biography of Buffalo Bill Cody, or while watching Scott Norwood blow Super Bowl XXV for the Bills. Try to finish your last bite just as Al Michaels screams, "No good! Wide right!". It's fun for the whole family. A lot more fun than when that event actually happened. Dad lost the Cadillac to a shady bookie and subsequently beat me with a large paddle. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW HE WOULD MISS?!?! I WAS FIVE!!!
EAGLES: - Eagles RB Brian Westrbook has no plans to retire. He also fully believes McNabb will be back under center for the Birds in 2010, despite rumors that Donovan is headed to Denver?!?! (Denver Examiner, Philly.com)
- Former Eagle WR Donte Stallworth got booted from the Browns, but he's already got a workout with another NFL team. . .the Detroit Lions. "Stallworth entered the NFL as a first-round draft pick in 2002 out of Tennessee. He was suspended for the entire 2009 season after pleading guilty to felony DUI manslaughter". (The Detroit News)
- Julius Peppers wants out of Carolina. Wouldn't it be great to see him line up on the Eagles D-Line?? (AP)
PHILLIES: - Roy Halladay has a helluva work ethic. Dude's there every morning at 7am to get in his workout and prepare for the season. Hopefully this rubs off on the young arms and sets a precedent for the staff as a whole. (Daily News)
FLYERS: - The Fly Guys look to complete a Home-and-Home sweep of the Devils tonight. Curious whether the Devils will look to get some revenge on Jeff Carter for his lights-out shoulder check on Anssi Salmela. (Atlantic City Press)
- The Flyers avoided a 3-game losing streak by beating the Devils 3-2 last night. They are now tied for 7th place in the Eastern Conference with 61 points. The real story of the night, though, was Jeff Carter's vicious shoulder check on Anssi Salmela. Salmela scores a goal, but he loses some teeth and breaks his nose in the process. Here's the video:
- Stephen A. Smith is back in town. In case you've forgotten, he's the loud mouthed shouter that used to write for the Inquirer and then went on to scream at people on ESPN for a while. Anyway, the Inquirer didn't want him back, and they were actually paying him NOT to write, but he sued and yadda yadda yadda. Here's why nobody likes the guy: He's just a little too self-important...
One thing you have to respect about Stephen A. Smith, though, is that he doesn't mind sparking fights and giving people in the press and on radio shows lots to talk about. Like, in this article from The Inquirer, he says the Sixers should just throw their season in hopes of getting a top draft pick.
Hank Baskett, the former Eagles receiver and current Colts special teamer, muffed an onside kick to open the second half. In doing so, he set up a go-ahead TD drive for the Saints, and he made Sean Payton look like genius. See the video below.
Oddly, Baskett has had great success as a special teamer. In 2007 he was named Special Teams MVP by his philly teammates.
1.) You are a Tasty-Kake loving Philadelphia Phillies fan, but your wife and two kids are all New York Yankees fans. What was it like inside your home during the World Series? It was horrible. To watch the Phillies fall apart as my family glorified in their ineptitude brought my mind to the precipice of insanity. What's worse is that my wife, who banged pots out the window when the Phillies won the 2008 series, proudly sat quietly next to me as I watched Howard fail over and over and over and over and over. This year, she danced the silent dance alone.
2.) Describe David Akers in one word: Sublime. 3.) Will Donovan McNabb be quarterback of the Philadelphia Eagles next season? I'm going to go with Coach on this one - Yes. Seriously - having two 1st string QB's plus Kolb? Who wouldn't want that, except maybe PETA?
4.) You played the tuba in the University of Richmond pep band. In the pep band hierarchy, which musician gets more props: the tuba player or the slide trombone player? And which one gets more ladies? Seriously, you need to ask? Tuba on both counts. If by Props you meant taunted mercilessly by everyone at every single sporting event, and if by Ladies you mean rocks thrown at you during the Hanover Halloween parade.
I did get my rear-end grabbed by another school's majorette, which was cool and almost made up for the "TOOOOOOO BAAAAAAA" chants at football games. Besides, Trombonists were called Boners - try to live that one down as a high school freshman. And no, Band Camp is not like that at all.
5.) What do you think of the Roy Halladay / Cliff Lee trade? So we still have one near automatic 9-inning pitcher. Great. What do we do about the other 3 games?
6.) If you had a novelty license plate, what would it say? RAUL
7.) Your mates from your championship winning English soccer team call you "Stone Hands Ramsburg". Please explain. I was the token American goal keeper for our 3peat championship football team. I think they were more excited about someone who actually preferred staying in goal than anything else. They called my "The Hands" or John "The Cat" or my favorite - "How the F*@#&! Hell did you let that through? For Christ's sake!"
As for "Stone Hands" I think you are confusing nicknames with my other football career, as the 5th string TE for the MNHS Tigers. I recall being called the "slowest *%^!( on the field, and that I should stick to blocking." That is about the same time I joined the marching band.
8.) It appears your male offspring is developing into a left-handed thrower. This is a commodity. How will you help him capitalize on this? Are you prepared to tape his right arm to his side and force him to throw 50 baseballs through a tire each day? To be perfectly honest, I think I'll be the one asking him to take a break so he can eat. The kid loves balls. We play baseball, basketball, football, and soccer for about 90% of play time. He can already whip a ball across the room, and was batting about a .190 over the summer. He drop kicks, place kicks, and passes. He loves scoring goals in our makeshift net, even asking me to be the "goa keepa".
He stands up for Arsenal, sings the Eagles fight song, and would body check his friend Chase into the boards if we let him watch Hockey. So Yes, but I wouldn't have too. I just hope he has this much fun when he's 12, 22, or 32.
9.) What was your most meaningful moment in sports, either as a fan or player? I was "traded" from the best little league team to the worst one year - the other team needed players. The next game was against my old team, and I caught what would have been the first home run of the game - just yanked that line drive right out of the air at the fence. Vindication felt great.
10.) If you could be any Philadelphia sports star (athlete, coach, personality), who would it be and why? Merill Reese. Hands down the best announcer. EVER.
BONUS QUESTION:If you could choose a theme song for yourself, what would it be?
...Because he's an ASSHOLE! Now he's being accused of rape. I find it amazing that this guy is not only employed with a job where he flashes his phony grin on the TV screen every Sunday, but he's also a Hall of Fame member. Have people forgotten who this prick is? Let me remind you, he is an attempted murderer. It's one thing to get mad at another dude on your team, but it's something a lot darkere - criminal, even - when you stab that person in the neck and tried to kill him. But of course Irvin was on the Cowboys, and Jerry Jones just swept that one right under the rug. But that's just one incident in a long string of allegations and legal nightmares. Read more (from his wikipedia page) below, and ask yourself, how does so much misfortune fall in one guy's lap? The answer? He's a lying, self-serving, manipulative scumbag. And he was a Cowboy. I wish I could have been there when his career ended.
1996 arrest In March 1996, Irvin was arrested on charges of cocaine possession at a hotel party celebrating his 30th birthday. After numerous court appearances amid a national media circus, which featured Irvin showing up to court in a full-length mink coat, he pled no contest to the charges and was sentenced to community service, ordered to pay a $10,000 fine, and put on 4-years probation. When drug-tested for illicit drugs, he tested negative. But the NFL suspended Irvin for the first five games of the 1996 season. In Irvin's 1996 absence, the Cowboys struggled out of the gate and never recovered. Upon his return from suspension, Irvin tallied 962 receiving yards in only 11 games. [edit]
1998 alleged assault In 1998 Irvin was alleged to be involved in a bizarre incident during training camp when he allegedly inflicted a two-inch cut in the neck of Dallas guard Everett McIver while some team members were getting haircuts.[7] Whether it was battery or accidental McIver did not press charges, and rumors swirled that Irvin brokered a six-figure settlement with McIver to drop the matter. Accounts of this incident after the alleged settlement became difficult to find or research in the local Dallas press.[8]
[edit] False sexual assault allegation Irvin sustained further damage to his reputation in 1996 when controversy reared its head again as the Cowboys prepared to play the Carolina Panthers for their NFC Divisional Playoff game. Media reports stated that Irvin and teammate Erik Williams had sexually assaulted a Dallas woman, Nina Shahravan, and, with a gun to her head, videotaped the interaction. Despite Williams' and Irvin's denials of the allegations, the story overshadowed the game, which the Cowboys lost. The accuser was later proven to have fabricated the entire incident. She recanted her story, pled guilty to perjury and filing a false police report and was sentenced to 90 days in prison and a fine. In the first quarter of the playoff game with Carolina, with Shahravan's allegations under active investigation by Dallas police, Irvin suffered a broken collarbone, ending his 1996 season.
A year following his retirement from the NFL, Irvin again was arrested on drug possession charges.[9] In this case, Irvin was in a Dallas apartment with an unrelated woman. Neither answered the door when police drug task force agents arrived with a search warrant. Police entered the apartment forcibly, finding drugs. Irvin and the female were placed under arrest, though charges against Irvin were later dropped.
The promises of a new lifestyle in broadcasting appeared to be short-lived, with Irvin again arrested. In this instance Irvin was pulled over in
Plano, Texas for speeding on November 25, 2005. Irvin was arrested on an outstanding warrant on an unpaid speeding ticket in Irving, Texas, but was also cited for misdemeanor possession of drug paraphernalia after police searched his car and found the marijuana pipe, and plastic bags with marijuana residue.[10] Irvin was arrested for a Class C misdemeanor. He was later released on bond, with ESPN spokesman Josh Krulewitz saying only that: "We are reviewing the facts of the situation and have no comment at this time."
Two days after his arrest, Irvin appeared on ESPN's "Sunday NFL Countdown", as scheduled, on November 27, 2005. In his on-the-air comments that evening, he stated that he had taken the drug paraphernalia away from a longtime friend who was battling a drug addiction. Irvin told the
Associated Press he was trying to help someone close to him get off drugs and cares more about that than his chances of being inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame. The next day Irvin said the pipe was in fact his brother's and he (Irvin) was going to throw it out but had forgotten to do so.
On December 1, 2005, however, ESPN suspended Irvin for the Sunday and Monday Night Countdown shows on December 4 and December 5, 2005.[11] He returned to both shows with no mention or consequence of the past incident.
EAGLES - McNabb believes Vick could help other teams. Then he went on Sports Center and tried his hand at the studio analyst thing. Read all his comments in this article from Les Bown of the The Daily News.
- Eagles hire former GM Phil Savage as their Draft Consultant. "Savage, 44, spent four years as senior vice president and general manager of the Cleveland Browns." (CSNPhilly.com). Great, we hired the brain child who built the NFL powerhouse known as the Cleveland Browns. /sad trombone. . .
PHILLIES - The Phillies signed reliever Oscar Villarreal to a minor-league deal on Thursday. "Villarreal, who missed the entire 2009 season recovering from Tommy John surgery, will not be invited to spring training."
SONG LYRIC TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT: "Maybe, baby, I just wanna do you / do you wann do me, do me, underneath the moonlight?"
WHACKY FOREINGER OF THE DAY: Because foreigners are whacky and unpredictable - A Swedish company is selling Pee & Poo Plush Toys! You can buy them online here at the official Pee&Poo website. I like the Pee&Poo combo duo myself.
There's always a song that plays when the closer jogs in from the bullpen and takes his warm up throws from the mound. This song is usually hand-selected by the closer himself, and it's meant to serve as a form of motivation for the pitcher, and intimidation for the batter. It is, in effect, the closer's anthem. Who can forget "Wild Thing" playing every time Charlie Sheen's character took the mound in Major League? And, in real life, most baseball fans think of Mariano Rivera whenever they hear Enter Sadman by Metallica. For Phillies fans, this is particularly painful because it's the song that played just before MO closed out the World Series. It's a pretty intimdating song to hear come blasting out of a stadium's speakers. . .
The songs vary by pitcher. Our very own Brad Lidge chose "Soldiers" by Drowning Pool as his theme song during his brilliant 2008 campaign. The song is an homage to both our US service men and Lidge's love of metal. In 2009 he chose "No More Sorrow" by Linkin Park (which, frankly, sucks).
Jonathan Papplebon, Boston's steely eyed closer, chose "I'm Shipping Up To Boston" by the Dropkick Murphys for his entrance. This obviosuly keeps Boston's loyal Irish fanbase happy as hell.
Tom Gordon used to chug out to the mound while "The Flash Gordon Theme" by Queen blared throughout the stadium. (Flash! Ah-Ah! King of the impossible!). Jose Valverde used to strut out to "Big Poppa" by none other than the Notorious B-I-G. Now that's pretty badass. J.J. Putz made his entrance to AC/DC's "Thunderstruck". And big fat Eric Gagne used to enter to "Welcome To The Jungle". So you see, there's no real formula here. All pitchers try and pick a loud, intimidating song that will pump up both themselves as well as the fans.
I have a different theory.
Baseball, more than any other sport, is a mental game. It's a long season made up of long games and long traveling stretches. Much of a baseball player's time is spent inside of his own head - waiting in the dugout, waiting in between pitches, waiting in between innings, waiting for planes, waiting for a ball to get their way. All this waiting leads to thinking, and thinking is the death of any major leaguer. The more you think, the worse you are. Baseball, of course, is the only sport to have something known as the "Steve Blass Disease", whereby "talented players inexplicably and permanently seem to lose their ability to accurately throw a baseball" (via wikipedia).
So yeah, my theory is that closer's should try their damndest to screw with batters' heads. And they should do this by selecting seemingly strange entrance songs.
Reasoning: By now, all batters expect to hear something rageful like Enter Sandman or Thunderstruck, so they aren't phased when some sinister rock anthem echoes in their ears. The only way to really mess with his mind, then, is to surprise him with a non-traditional closer jam. So yeah, the wait is over. Here are the TOP TEN CLOSER SONGS (THAT WILL NEVER BE USED)
5.) Shiny Happy People by REM: Would you be able to concentrate after hearing Michael Stype blaring at full throttle amplification in a Major League Baseball stadium. The fans would have to be in on it - laughing, swaying and HOLDING FRIGGIN HANDS like psycho christians at one of those mega churches in Texas. And it would be doubly effective if the VERY awkward video played on the stadium's jumbotron. In 3 minutes the ambience would no longer be that of a baseball game, but rather that of a dorky early nineties keg party where guys were happy to wear big polka dot shirts and stupid floppy hats. Advantage, home team.
4.) Unskinny Bop by Poison: This song will creep out and confuse like none other. Imagine hearing this "Everytime I touch ya you get hot, I wanna make love you never stop!" and then looking up the mound and seeing K-Rod wink at you?? And then it just gets more confusing when you hear, "What's right? What's wrong? What's left? What the hell is going on?". Hade enough Unskinny Bop, Mr Batter? Okay, now here's a 95mph thrown right at your head. TAKE THAT!
3.) Wipe Out by The Surfaris: I dare you to listen that song. Now try and get it out of your head. You can't, can you? Now try hitting a slider. *Optional: Pitcher does Pee-Wee Herman dance in between warm up tosses.
2.) Jesus Is a Friend of Mine by Sonseed: This needs no explanation. . .
1.) International Delight by Wayne Brady: The batter will be too busy trying to understand if that was really a Wayne Brady commercial that he just heard - and, if it was, (which it WAS) he will be so baffled by the absurdity that he won't be able to touch bat to ball. Not even just the tip? No, not even the tip.
- Super Bowl week and all eyes are on two guys who failed to win the big game together. The Big Lead reports that Donovan McNabb and Terrell Owens made peace last night at a party thrown by Shaq. Amazing that these guys are still relevant in the soap opera dramedy of the modern sports world. I wonder what words were actually exchanged behind the blockade of bodyguards. Guess we'll never know.
EAGLES: - Dick Jauron has been a head coach and a defensive coordinator in the NFL. Now he's just a D-Backs coach. Still, Dick says he's happy to be on the squad.
- Brian Dawkins and Rich Gannon weigh in on the state of the Eagles offense, Donovan's future , and running the football. Kind of nice to hear B-Dawk say, "Run the ball. With that passing attack, the way that thing is shaping up to be, go ahead and bring Donovan [McNabb] back to where he's supposed to be, and run that pill and let those weapons outside go to work." (via Inquirer)
PHILLIES: - The Phillies reached agreement with four pitching prospects: Righthanders David Herndon, J.C. Ramirez and Drew Naylorand lefthander Mike Zagurski. They also signed outfielder Freddie Guzman. "Guzman, 29, spent last season with the Triple A affiliates of Baltimore, Seattle, Boston and the New York Yankees. In 101 games, he hit .223 with two homers and 17 RBI but stole 45 bases in 54 attempts. A switch-hitter, he has spent parts of four seasons in the big leagues with a .211 average in 47 games." (via Philly Daily News)
- Check out Salisbury's State of the Phillies: Second Base at CSNPhilly.com. Great piece on Utley and the (dearth of) prospects waiting in the wings. And did you ever think of Utley as first-baseman? Apparently it could happen.
- The Good Phight has been breaking down the Phillies top 30 prospects over the past couple of weeks. Read about prospects #20 - #11 online today. Notable in the #20 - #11 list: Jonathan Singleton, Brody Colvin and Scott Mathieson. I love the taks on Mathieson: Now here's a guy who's easy to root for. After two Tommy John surgeries, Mathieson has made a remarkable recovery and is now knocking on the door of the majors. A Top 10 prospect for the organization from 2004 through 2006 as a starter, Mathieson has re-invented himself as a fireballing reliever, and he cruised through three levels in 2009 (32.1 IP, 9.5 K/9, 3.3 BB/9, 0.28 HR/9, and a 2.61 FIP between the GCL, Clearwater, and Reading) before turning heads at the Arizona Fall League by flashing closer-quality stuff while whiffing 15 in 12.2 innings. He's down here, and not in the Top 10, because some caution is necessary -- he's still an injury risk, and he's yet to show that he can pitch on back-to-back days. The Phillies would be wise to see how he responds to that in Lehigh Valley before tossing him into the major league pen, so a midseason call up would be the most prudent course of action.
RANDOM CONNECTIONS TO PHILLY: - Episcopal Academy grad and Saints fullback Kyle Eckel is under scrutiny right now, as people are starting to ask: "Why is Eckel, who ran for 1,147 yard at Navy in 2004, playing in Super Bowl XLIV instead of fulfilling his military obligation in the U.S. Nay?" Read more in this article by Gregg Doyel at CBSSports.com
WHACKY FOREGINERS OF THE DAY: Because foreigners are strange and unpredictable - England pop duo JEDWARD cover Ice-Ice Baby, and they even get a cameo from Mr. Vanilla himself. This is just too strange for words
SONG FOR THE DAY: Let's switch gears and enjoy a song that actually doesn't suck...
- The Eagles have hired Dick Jauron to replace Brian Stewart as Defensive Backs Coach. "Jauron and Eagles head coach Andy Reid are close friends and worked together on Mike Holmgren’s staff with the Packers in the mid-1990s...Jauron served as the Bills’ head coach from 2006 through Week 10 of this past season, going 24-33 before getting fired in November." First task to accomplish with the DB's - tackling. Can't win if you can't tackle, and it was a huge problem all year long. (via PhillyBurbs)
- Michael Vick to remain in Eagles green? "NFL Network's Michael Lombardi reported Tuesday night that the Eagles, suddenly, plan to keep quarterback Michael Vick. Lombardi says the Eagles feel as if they're "in a luxury position" with regard to their current quarterback group. They have Vick, probable future starter Kevin Kolb, and five-time Pro Bowler Donovan McNabb signed through 2010." (via profootballtalk.com)
- Schmidt and Morandini will be in Clearwater for Spring Ball. "Former Phillies Mike Schmidt and Mickey Morandini will return to Clearwater, Fla., as guest instructors for the Phils in spring training this year, the team announced yesterday." (via Inquirer)
THIS GUY SUCKS: Check out this video of a high-school volleyball coach pegging one of his players in the head with a ball. Guy deserves a beat down. At least he issued an apology.
- Tom Brookshier, All-Pro Cornerback on the Eagles 1960 World Champion team, passed away at age 78. Hall of fame sportswriter Ray Didinger remembers the Eagles legend in this great article from CSN Philly.
- Eagles President Joe Banner had some interesting comments on the McNabb situation: "Here's the reality on that," Banner said. "It sounds evasive, but it isn't. . . . We really have not had the meeting to start figuring this stuff out. Obviously we have to do that. . . . Obviously we have to make a decision on what we're going to do. But at this moment, I can tell you that we haven't even laid out a plan or sat down and even exchanged our different ideas or thoughts on that."
- Speaking of Don, here's an interesting "Ode to Donovan". I like the bluesy music and the stilted way the guy recites his satiric sports poetry:
- Ruben Amaro Jr defends the Cliff Lee trade and makes this bold statement: "We cannot be the New York Yankees," Amaro said. "We have to have people that we can bring to the big leagues from our system. The guys who are our core players are guys from our system." Okay, Ruben, we can't BE the Yankees, but we have to BEAT the Yankees.
- Former Philadelhpia Eagle Herschel Walker is victorious in his first MMA battle. Reread that sentence. Walker, who won the Heisman Trophy in 1982 and was an Olympian in 1992, won by TKO at 2:17 in the third round over Greg Nagy.
- Antonio Bastardo is having one helluva an off-season. Looks likely he'll be a regular face in the Phillies bullpen this season. Bastardo has pitched in 17 innings this postseason, allowing just four hits, three walks while striking out 26 for an ERA of 0.53.
- DeSean Jackson struts his stuff at the Pro Bowl and, as he did all season, outruns a handful of defenders for a 50+ yard TD.
- NFL announces 2000's all decade team. David Akers is the only current Eagle to make the squad, but former Eagles Brian Dawkins and Terrel Owens made the roster as well.
- Kevin Kolb wants his chance to start at QB. "I want to be a starter in the NFL," Kolb told the Fort Worth Star-Telegram. "That's my No. 1 goal right now. I want that opportunity. But I'm going to be a team player. I trust (coach) Andy (Reid). I trust his decisions and his ability to see what's in the future and plan out my career the right way. Hopefully, we'll do those things to get me on the field at some point, not knowing when it's going to be."
- Andre Miller, formerly of the 76ers, scored 52 points in an OT win over the Dallas Mavericks this weekend. Meanwhile, the Sixers barely squeak by the lowly Nets. Remember, the Nets only have 4 WINS on the entire season.
RENEGADE ANIMAL OF THE DAY: A horny goat uses his head to smash in the door to a California strip club. Once inside the goat stares at himself in the mirror for a while, and then gets shooed away. Watch the video here.
SONG LYRICS TAKEN OUT OF CONTEXT: "I haven't slept for two days / I've bathed in nothing but sweat / And I've made hallways scenes for things to regret "
