You're an unrestricted free agent who spent last season in football hell - Buffalo. You'd think you would try and make the most of your offeason and prepare for next season, when hopefully you'll be with a team who actually has a QB and can contend for a playoff spot. Or maybe not. Myabe you want to a wear a lame wig and take your shirt off, exposing a cheesey gold necklace. And if you're gonna do it, you might want to find a designer who can make pants that don't look the sweats that the fat kid wore when you abused him in a rumble-fumble beatdown when you were 10 years old. (Via TMZ)
Introducing Silver's Corner! Mike Silver - an aggressively disgruntled Chicagoan with very tiny feet - offers insights, observations and (occasionally) cooking tips to help you get through your miserable existence.
Hi there! Name's Silver, what's yours? Really? Well, I guess that could sound ok...with ...maybe a nice last name. Oh. In that case, maybe you have a nick name? You don't? Fancy that. Well, let's just move on...Seriously, that's your name? This isn't some horrible joke? How is your relationship with your parents? Yeah, I'd have the same. Enough about you, let me give you a quick introduction about myself and what you can look forward to reading in this section moving forward.
Height: 6'2" (1.87 meters for you blokes across the pond) Weight: 192lbs (87.27 kilos - That's a lot of cocaine if I happened to be made out of cocaine!) Temperature: Medium-rare Likes: Whiskey, food (both eating and cooking), beer, old Royal Rumbles, hip-hop, FIFA (the video game, not the corrupt head of world football), sweatpants and torn hoodies Dislikes: Fashion, flavored alcohols, new-age diets, small talk, smoking bans, high-pitched laughs, snakes (especially on planes), Adrian Brody Sports Teams: Chicago White Sox, Chicago Bears, Chicago Blackhawks, Arsenal, and if you can teach me how cricket and/or rugby is played, you can select my allegiance for that particular sport Full Disclosure: I have a beard
Now, the focus of this section has not been fully fleshed out - hell, it's barely been thought about - so what will follow is a thought dump (one of the more culturally accepted dumps) for whatever wacky theory, rant, recipe, thought or observation that pops into my head. Tread carefully my new found friends, things could get weird.
I will start this as I start most of my relationships: by bringing the sane, simple, and helpful Me. FYI, I wait for the crazy to start leaking out around date #2. Below is a great recipe that should help make you the star of any BBQ, back yard get together or intervention.
The Buffalo Bill "Would you eat me? I'd eat me. I'd eat me hard!"
Ingredients - 1lb ground buffalo - 1 jalapeno - 1 clove garlic (minced) - 1/4 white onion (diced finely) - 1 sprig Rosemary - 1 tsp liquid smoke - Pack of kaiser rolls (or really any of your favorite bun) - Toasted - Sharp Cheddar cheese (can leave out if you want to stay a bit healthier) - Salt and pepper - 1 tomato
Preparation First, you want to roast the jalapeno. To do this, use any open flame you have - grill, gas stove, blow torch, Olympic Torch - and place the jalapeno on top, turning every couple of minutes. You should get a nice char on the outside. Once roasted, dice the jalapeno, remembering to wash your hands THOROUGHLY after this. Especially if you have a date later that night. Trust me on that one. This roasting process should help lower the heat from the jalapeno, turning it into more of a assisting flavor and not over powering any other ingredient.
Next, mix the buffalo, diced jalapeno, garlic, onion, rosemary, liquid smoke, salt and pepper in a bowl. Let sit - the longer the better. If it will be sitting over night, refrigerate, but remember to bring back to room temperature before cooking.
Section the meat into 3 large - 4 small - patties and place on grill or grill pan over high heat. Cooking times will depend on heat of the grill/stove, but 4 minutes a side should suffice. If you must err, err on the side of less cooking time. Buffalo is an incredibly lean meat, meaning it can dry out very quickly. If you are adding cheese, place on patties after flipping.
Remove patties from grill and let rest on a plate for 2 minutes. Place patties on toasted buns, top with sliced tomato, and whatever topping you like - I'd suggest trying it without anything else as there are a lot of flavors going on already.
Serve along side some home-made chips (crisps) or if you're looking to keep it healthy, serve alongside grilled zucchini spears. Just slice a couple zucchinis into spears, drizzle with olive oil and season with sea salt and pepper. Place on grill until a good char is reached, but leaving a bit of crunch in the middle.
Consumption Enjoy this great burger while watching Silence of the Lambs, while reading the biography of Buffalo Bill Cody, or while watching Scott Norwood blow Super Bowl XXV for the Bills. Try to finish your last bite just as Al Michaels screams, "No good! Wide right!". It's fun for the whole family. A lot more fun than when that event actually happened. Dad lost the Cadillac to a shady bookie and subsequently beat me with a large paddle. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW HE WOULD MISS?!?! I WAS FIVE!!!
EAGLES: - Eagles RB Brian Westrbook has no plans to retire. He also fully believes McNabb will be back under center for the Birds in 2010, despite rumors that Donovan is headed to Denver?!?! (Denver Examiner, Philly.com)
- Former Eagle WR Donte Stallworth got booted from the Browns, but he's already got a workout with another NFL team. . .the Detroit Lions. "Stallworth entered the NFL as a first-round draft pick in 2002 out of Tennessee. He was suspended for the entire 2009 season after pleading guilty to felony DUI manslaughter". (The Detroit News)
- Julius Peppers wants out of Carolina. Wouldn't it be great to see him line up on the Eagles D-Line?? (AP)
PHILLIES: - Roy Halladay has a helluva work ethic. Dude's there every morning at 7am to get in his workout and prepare for the season. Hopefully this rubs off on the young arms and sets a precedent for the staff as a whole. (Daily News)
FLYERS: - The Fly Guys look to complete a Home-and-Home sweep of the Devils tonight. Curious whether the Devils will look to get some revenge on Jeff Carter for his lights-out shoulder check on Anssi Salmela. (Atlantic City Press)
- The Flyers avoided a 3-game losing streak by beating the Devils 3-2 last night. They are now tied for 7th place in the Eastern Conference with 61 points. The real story of the night, though, was Jeff Carter's vicious shoulder check on Anssi Salmela. Salmela scores a goal, but he loses some teeth and breaks his nose in the process. Here's the video:
- Stephen A. Smith is back in town. In case you've forgotten, he's the loud mouthed shouter that used to write for the Inquirer and then went on to scream at people on ESPN for a while. Anyway, the Inquirer didn't want him back, and they were actually paying him NOT to write, but he sued and yadda yadda yadda. Here's why nobody likes the guy: He's just a little too self-important...
One thing you have to respect about Stephen A. Smith, though, is that he doesn't mind sparking fights and giving people in the press and on radio shows lots to talk about. Like, in this article from The Inquirer, he says the Sixers should just throw their season in hopes of getting a top draft pick.
Hank Baskett, the former Eagles receiver and current Colts special teamer, muffed an onside kick to open the second half. In doing so, he set up a go-ahead TD drive for the Saints, and he made Sean Payton look like genius. See the video below.
Oddly, Baskett has had great success as a special teamer. In 2007 he was named Special Teams MVP by his philly teammates.
1.) You are a Tasty-Kake loving Philadelphia Phillies fan, but your wife and two kids are all New York Yankees fans. What was it like inside your home during the World Series? It was horrible. To watch the Phillies fall apart as my family glorified in their ineptitude brought my mind to the precipice of insanity. What's worse is that my wife, who banged pots out the window when the Phillies won the 2008 series, proudly sat quietly next to me as I watched Howard fail over and over and over and over and over. This year, she danced the silent dance alone.
2.) Describe David Akers in one word: Sublime. 3.) Will Donovan McNabb be quarterback of the Philadelphia Eagles next season? I'm going to go with Coach on this one - Yes. Seriously - having two 1st string QB's plus Kolb? Who wouldn't want that, except maybe PETA?
4.) You played the tuba in the University of Richmond pep band. In the pep band hierarchy, which musician gets more props: the tuba player or the slide trombone player? And which one gets more ladies? Seriously, you need to ask? Tuba on both counts. If by Props you meant taunted mercilessly by everyone at every single sporting event, and if by Ladies you mean rocks thrown at you during the Hanover Halloween parade.
I did get my rear-end grabbed by another school's majorette, which was cool and almost made up for the "TOOOOOOO BAAAAAAA" chants at football games. Besides, Trombonists were called Boners - try to live that one down as a high school freshman. And no, Band Camp is not like that at all.
5.) What do you think of the Roy Halladay / Cliff Lee trade? So we still have one near automatic 9-inning pitcher. Great. What do we do about the other 3 games?
6.) If you had a novelty license plate, what would it say? RAUL
7.) Your mates from your championship winning English soccer team call you "Stone Hands Ramsburg". Please explain. I was the token American goal keeper for our 3peat championship football team. I think they were more excited about someone who actually preferred staying in goal than anything else. They called my "The Hands" or John "The Cat" or my favorite - "How the F*@#&! Hell did you let that through? For Christ's sake!"
As for "Stone Hands" I think you are confusing nicknames with my other football career, as the 5th string TE for the MNHS Tigers. I recall being called the "slowest *%^!( on the field, and that I should stick to blocking." That is about the same time I joined the marching band.
8.) It appears your male offspring is developing into a left-handed thrower. This is a commodity. How will you help him capitalize on this? Are you prepared to tape his right arm to his side and force him to throw 50 baseballs through a tire each day? To be perfectly honest, I think I'll be the one asking him to take a break so he can eat. The kid loves balls. We play baseball, basketball, football, and soccer for about 90% of play time. He can already whip a ball across the room, and was batting about a .190 over the summer. He drop kicks, place kicks, and passes. He loves scoring goals in our makeshift net, even asking me to be the "goa keepa".
He stands up for Arsenal, sings the Eagles fight song, and would body check his friend Chase into the boards if we let him watch Hockey. So Yes, but I wouldn't have too. I just hope he has this much fun when he's 12, 22, or 32.
9.) What was your most meaningful moment in sports, either as a fan or player? I was "traded" from the best little league team to the worst one year - the other team needed players. The next game was against my old team, and I caught what would have been the first home run of the game - just yanked that line drive right out of the air at the fence. Vindication felt great.
10.) If you could be any Philadelphia sports star (athlete, coach, personality), who would it be and why? Merill Reese. Hands down the best announcer. EVER.
BONUS QUESTION:If you could choose a theme song for yourself, what would it be?
